I don’t know about you, but I think change is often a good thing. Sometimes even the best thing. I am always looking to change things up and shake up the status quo.
In 2002, we changed things up by launching a website called XXXchurch.com and going to the AVN Adult Entertainment Expo to hand out Bibles.
In 2004, we launched X3watch, the first free accountability software of its kind and challenged people to change the way they do life online.
In 2010, we changed our ministry focus to incorporate recovery tools by releasing X3pure, a 30- day online recovery workshop specifically for those struggling with sex and porn addiction.
In 2012, we changed the way small groups are done by starting X3groups, the first online support based small groups program for men and women who struggle with sex addiction.
In 2014, we revamped our entire website (again).
In late 2015, we changed the way people view addiction and our approach to freedom from it with the introduction of our cutting edge program, My Pilgrimage.
Then in 2016, we changed things up by launching Recover, the first comprehensive resource we ever offered for spouses of those who committed sexual betrayal.
We’ve been busy.
And I’ll be honest, sometimes we’ve changed things too quickly, and it backfired.
But I am the type of guy who always wants to lead out with fresh vision rather than sitting back on my butt just riding out the ordinary or “the way we always have done it.”
Organizations that are willing to change will evolve and grow. Those who don’t embrace change end up closing their doors after a while.
So, that being said, I have another big change I’d like to tell you about.
Like I said, in 2015 we launched My Pilgrimage and kind of got away from X3pure. There were a few reasons for this.
My Pilgrimage was a fresh new take on a topic that we have been addressing for so long and was so excited to develop an additional resource for people.
X3pure was developed by myself and a professional therapist named Steven Luff, which was built on the work that we did for the book Pure Eyes. Our friend Jake Larson did the teaching for the series and was something we were extremely proud of. That is until Jake lost his position as a full-time minister at his church after years of hiding his porn addiction and an extra marital affair.
This was something that I wrestled with the board of directors. Does the fall of Jake Larson disqualify the teachings that he did at his church or for our ministry? It was still helping people, but it never sat right with me.
One day I got an email from a guy watching the X3pure series and said he connected with Jake and then heard about what happened and lost all hope. He said, “If the guy teaching this stuff can’t help himself, how can I ever get free?” That is when I knew we had to do something else.
I decided we must re-launch X3pure, and I was not going to find just a great communicator, but I was going to find someone who I believed in and you could believe in.
Years ago I was given the opportunity to be on a national TV show. It was a 10-minute expose on our ministry and my family, and I spent a few days with an amazing reporter who I had seen so many times on TV. He did an incredible piece on our ministry and a year or so later called me and put me on a 30-minute special for the network. We became friends, although we could never talk about it. He always wanted his reporting to be fair and not have anyone think that he was in my corner. I knew he loved the Lord and we often talked about how our worlds were similar. We were one of the hundreds of booths at an Adult Expo who were the only believers in the room, and he was one of fifty reporters in his newsroom and the only believer. He went out on a limb for me, and the night the 30-minute special ran, my phone rang about 10 pm my time, which was 1 am his. He asked me what I thought. I thanked him again and then he said something I will never forget. “If you ever get caught in the middle of an affair or into this porn stuff, I will cut your balls off, hang them on a tree and light them on fire. Send my love to your wife, Jeanette.” And then he hung up.
I get it. There is a lot on the line, and I hear his voice in the back of my head often.
A few months ago, I called Carl Thomas. Carl, I had known for almost eight years now and was the original small group leader of X3groups.com. Not only the original leader but the guy who grew that program for us. He went on to do some things for us with outreach, web and everything else you can think of. I have spent time with Carl’s family, and his wife was on the recover.org project. I called him and asked, “What do you think about teaching the new x3pure series?”
I didn’t talk about lighting his balls on fire on a tree but said I care more about how you live your life than how good you can teach.
Carl has read X3pure workbook and the Pure Eyes books multiple times and has come out of his own crazy story. He also has been leading at least one X3group since day 1. He knows what guys are experiencing and what guys need to hear. He’s from Jersey, so you have to get used to that accent, but there is no B.S. with Carl, and that is where he and I are most alike.
He shoots straight and doesn’t sugar coat it. I am proud to roll out this new project as we have reshot every video and re-wrote the workbook.
The new X3pure is being released on September 12th.
It still follows the same teaching.
But it stresses Freedom VS. Sobriety as the goal. It’s in your face and blunt. It’s practical.
Stay tuned. I’ll keep you posted, but I know that the new X3pure is going to be something like you have never seen before.
Real, honest and down to earth.